Living With Arms in the Air

I sat behind my daughter and watched as she raised her arms, Zambia heat brushing bare skin as the safari jeep drove along the park's dusty roads.  Earlier we had watched elephants, hippos, zebras, impalas, and more, not to mention the male lions mere feet from our reach.  The day was spent enjoying yet another aspect of Africa, our trip winding to a few days (at least that was the plan before God blessed us with a volcano eruption and delayed flights).

Watching my daughter, I thought, This is it!  This is how I want to spend my life -- riding with my arms thrown up in reckless abandon!  Embracing each moment and each adventure. 

Our family spent three weeks with friends who live and work on the campus of African Bible College in Malawi, Africa.  I hardly know where to begin to share all our amazing experiences -- but we're putting together a "workshop" on our adventures so that we can share it with you on Wednesday, May 26th of this month. 

I wanted to take a moment to share what I learned during the inspiring and oh-so-encouraging KMC Homeschool Conference this past weekend.  While we were in Africa, we had the privelege of attending a few classes where our friend, Bob, is a professor.  Something he reiterated, (as the students were just returning from a week long Spring Break), is the importance of Finishing Well.  He encouraged his students, especially the seniors, to "push through" and to stay focused as they came to the end of the school year and, as seniors, neared graduation.  As home school parents, we, too, are coming to the end of another school year, pushing through those last few projects, tests, nearing the end of a curriculum. 

Rebekah carrying Baby Wonder on her back, just like the native mamas!

The conference began on Friday evening with Debra Bell, author of The Ultimate Guide To Homeschooling, who spoke on the topic of "Home Schooling From A Foundation of Grace."  Her talk touched me so deeply that when I went up afterward to tell her thank you, I burst into tears!  I felt so silly, but there it was, emotion streaming down my cheeks as I tried to explain that her words met me at a sort of summit I've been climbing in the past few months.

Bell's outline:

I. Getting Started in Grace... remembering that life's pressures are not the source of grace, but the means of grace.

II. Continuing in Grace... letting my daily life demonstrate the power of the Gospel; allowing my children to witness my need for God's grace and the power of His grace working in my life.

III. Finishing in Grace... keeping in mind that God knows the future of my children and that I'm called to train them today but that I'm not responsible for their future.  (She shared that her four grown children have the great idea to do homeschool conferences together and talk about "The 10 Things Our Mother Did That You Ought Not To Do."  She lightheartedly, humbly shared how proud she is of her children, but that they've turned out in spite of her parenting and homeschooling methods.)  I don't know about you, but I tend to take waayy too much of the credit -- good or bad -- for my children's successes and failures!

Jordan giving a piggy-back ride...

The next day Kathy Kuhl, author of Homeschooling Your Struggling Learner, spoke a few different times on the aspects of teaching students with learning difficulties.  She reminded us moms to persevere, slow down, leave lots of room for creativity, keep exposing our children to many, many opportunities, and to be a continuous student of our children. 

Kuhl was a wealth of information with four pages of resources to help parents.  For instance, one of the ideas she shared was the "3 Stars and a Wish" concept in which the teacher, (or peers), critique writing, naming three things they like and one suggestion for improvement.  I had never heard of it before, but I've already started using it this week with my kiddos.  She reminded us of the importance of being our children's biggest fans, their biggest encouragers.  She encouraged us to keep the big picture in mind -- and to teach our children to see the big picture, too.

Rebekah surrounded by new friends in the village of Dzuwa.

One of Kathy Kuhl's talks was on a subject that is near and dear to my heart: Staying Sane, Keeping On: Balancing Your Priorities.  She reminded us of assumptions to avoid... perfectionism, sheltering or coddling, my child's success = my success (ah! another reminder for me in this area!).  She helped us recognize the importance of teaching certain attitudes... respect, self-awareness, passion for learning, humility, perseverance, and above all to love, serve, enjoy, and trust God.  

Kuhl encouraged us moms to pursue a healthy lifestyle for ourselves, making time to get away to reflect and plan, to seek out support (such as healthy friendships), exercise and maintain fitness, pursue our dreams and have a hobby or business.

Seth walking with the children to school in the village.

Kuhl then addressed the need to nurture our marriages.  She put a power point slide up that read, "Home Depot + ice cream - kids = date."  (Tweak that equation to fit your paradigm! smile.)  She inspired us to be spontaneous and intentional about pursuing our spouse!  An idea she shared is to learn to give the "elevator talk" in which you learn to convey the day's important information to your husband when he arrives home much the same way as if you were in an elevator and your boss stepped in and you had five floors to propose an important idea to him.  This was an aha! moment for me as I definitely can learn to be more concise in my conversation -- not only for my husband's sake, either! smile.

 

Myself, Jordan, and Nathaniel loving babies in an orphanage.

Kuhl finished by talking about the importance of families laughing together.  Ah, yes! 

My husband loving babies, too...

The final talk was given by Debra Bell who spoke on "Standing Strong With High Schoolers."  This was another talk that especially encouraged my heart as we've stepped off the high board into the adolescent years.  How is it that I found it incredibly affirming to hear her say, "The teenage years will not be fun.  There will be many fun times.  But in general, don't think that it's supposed to be fun."  Could it be that my ever-optimistic self knows I deal better when dealing with reality? smile.  Bell said, "Your teenager is not thinking How can I make this easy for Mom and Dad?" 

Yet what a wonderful time as our "babies" transition into men and women with their own ideals, values, beliefs, and God-given passions!  How exciting to be the ones who get to come alongside them in their journey, to be their "disciplers and fellow believers in need of grace!"

Nathaniel doing what he does best... loving on people...

So why did I insert pictures from our trip to Africa in this post?  (Besides the fact that I'm so stinkin proud of my family that I just couldn't help but share them with you all!)  Interestingly, the Homeschool Conference was the perfect way to "finish" a homeschool experience of a lifetime.  I didn't attend with the thought that there would be a connection between our trip and the conference.  And yet, everything I heard at the conference tied in with our experiences in Africa.

...little people in this case.

I suppose that, in many ways, Africa allowed me to watch my children, study them, get to know them on so many different levels -- levels which I've never had the opportunity to see them.  Really, it turned out to be so much more than a family trip.  It was more of an opportunity for six different people to experience the world through six different perspectives.  To experience a foundation of God's grace in a real, tangible way -- each of us met in our own unique place.  To discover a little more about ourselves and our strengths and weaknesses.  To find moments when our breath would catch and we'd suddenly know, I was made for this!  To grow in patience, understanding, and tolerance for one another.  To learn that the cost of one PSP or DSi game pays the rent for someone in Malawi.  To get the priceless gift of a chance to give ourselves away in tangible circumstances.  To act as disciplers along the journey.  To watch our children overcome "learning difficulties" only to thrive in moments when their hearts beat fast and their joy overflowed.  

I feel as though we've visited a Summit of Grace.  And to stand atop that mountain is exhilarating.  Humbling.  A throw-your-arms-up-in-the-air-moment, as the rush of His love and profound joy course through.

This homeschool journey... this parenting journey... as you press on, striving to Finish Well... may you, too, throw your arms up and embrace His adventures for you today!